Anything Considered

Some good food is meant for slow, thoughtful appreciation, and others for comfort gobbling. For instance, I could never slowly nibble on a cheap carbonara, or gobble down duck seared with foie gras. Both are wonderful, sinful cravings. But to compare them? I think not.

Food should be judged from the perspective in which it is to be enjoyed. There is no comparison between stuffing myself silly during zhi car meals with the family and gently appreciating a degustation menu with a friend. Certainly, the latter probably offers better food. But a good meal isn't simply the physical thing you chew upon, it is an intensely emotional and spiritual experience that can be shared with loved ones.

I went to meet J for lunch today. Chicken rice at Upper Thomson. The meal was good, but to be honest I didn't notice a thing I ate. Not the texture or freshness of the meat, or the sweetness of the sauce. What made that meal worth having, and worth having again, was the easy company and conversation with a good friend. Sure it was a good meal. We had Hainanese steamed chicken, sweet and sour pork, and fried beancurd, all of which were palatable in their own right. I didn't think they were amazing.

They weren't meant to be.

I am beginning to find that many of the things I enjoy in life are far more emotionally rewarding in the company of loved ones. It is as if the presence of a friend - the mutual appreciation and understanding in even the mundane, little activities - acts as an additive bonus to the quality of the experience as a whole. I know I can rattle off the names of people I'd like to be with for various activities offhand.

Relating with friends, like enjoying food, lead to a multitude of complex experiences. Sometimes you get annoyed at them, sometimes you're obsessed with them, sometimes you plainly can't understand them, and sometimes they know just the right buttons to push to make you feel like you're the person most loved in the world.

But it's worth it. Worth it all. (:

Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow.
Don't walk behind me, I may not lead.
Just walk beside me and be my friend.

ALBERT CAMUS (1913-1960)